Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
How drunk are you?
Completed.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize