O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize