5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
