I want to stick my p in your. b.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Found the puke drawer
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
