THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
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