It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
