She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize
