So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
