i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize