the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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