you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
