where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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