I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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