We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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