guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
