Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
