I wanna passion pit in your ass
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
