I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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