He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
