I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
