shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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