There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
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