i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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