Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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