so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
