I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
