It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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