As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
