i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
