Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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