Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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