Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize