you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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