My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
should my penis look like a turkey
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize