I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
