my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
