Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Come see our sink grown plant.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Found your dick twin last night
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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