you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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