they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
