At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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