The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
