yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
