i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
