I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize