yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
