i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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