Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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