i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
