Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
