i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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