Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
