her vagine was all disorganized.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
