I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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