both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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