And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Randomize
